Making Christmas Wishes Come True

With one month of preparation for two

deserving combat wounded Houston veterans was on full display! Bob Voeller, a friend and manager of the Houston Hobby Airports, Southwest Airlines maintenance section was given a task. Find a few deserving, in need, combat wounded hero families and shower them with an unforgettable Christmas. After Bob shared the mission with his fellow maintenance staff, their generosity went into full effect. With the help of as many as 40 SWA staff members, the 2 families were given everything on their wish list, holiday spending money and even HEB grocery store gift cards! The best part of their incredible show of generosity? Their actions inspired other segments of Southwest Airlines employees, also from Hobby Airport to seek out (2) more combat wounded veteran families and they also, were met with a complete wish list, clothes, shoes and more! HEB (Here Everything’s Better) grocery store also gave the Coalition (8) $100 gift cards which are going as far as San Antonio & Ft. Hood.

Christmas spirt on full display here in Houston!!

Holidays Without Loved Ones

The holidays are very special to my family. While my husband was still active duty Army, there were a few years he was gone a lot. He missed 3 Thanksgivings and Christmases in a row because he was deployed to Afghanistan, and then deployed to Iraq after that. We had three small children at that time and they were used to their dad being gone often.

 We tried to celebrate the holidays either before he deployed, or after he got home. The first deployment (06-07 to Afghanistan) we didn’t think about celebrating the holidays before he left, we were just trying to deal with the emotions of him leaving. The next deployment (07-09 to Iraq) we celebrated Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas all in one. This deployment he was for 15 months. When the holiday season came around again, we waited until he returned home and celebrated it late, in January.

                Since we understand the sadness of having a family member gone and not knowing if they will be home for future holiday seasons, we keep all our service members currently serving in the front of our hearts for the season, and honestly all year. Every year we find a service member that is deployed and send them things through out his deployment. We will also send their family little reminders that we are thinking and praying for them. This year we have started visiting the veterans in our local hospitals and nursing homes around Christmas with our local VFW.  Every year during the holidays we try to find a special way to make veterans and service members feel appreciated and loved. They are our heroes. 

T'is the Season

The Holiday Season is officially upon us.  Thanksgiving marked the beginning with a huge meal. Whether it’s just time with your immediate family or time with your extended family, these are especially the times to be cherished. Usually we hurry around our family’s different houses, constantly watching the clock so we aren’t late to the next get-together.  Honestly, I feel like when we do that nobody really gets to enjoy the holiday, and like I didn’t really get to spend time with those that are most important.  That’s what the holidays are about right?

Thanksgiving is also the start to all the crazy holiday shopping! Black Friday, Cyber Monday, it’s a countdown to get Christmas gifts at all the right prices! Also after Thanksgiving neighbors start putting up their Christmas trees, and decorating their homes for Christmas. Sometimes I feel like I just can’t keep up with it all. My husband and I are still in school, so we had projects, papers, presentations, and exams to complete as well as making a special Thanksgiving for our family.

We took Thanksgiving Day to just relax, enjoy our family, and just be at home. We had some family and a few friends come over.  It was a nice relaxing day, spending some quality time together. We also watched the Cowboy’s football game, their victory was just the perfect ending to such a nice relaxing day.

We also like to take a moment to give thanks for everything we have been fortunate enough to have. Especially veteran organizations like, The Coalition To Salute America’s Heroes. They give so much to so many veterans, we feel like it’s import to show her the importance of helping and giving to those less fortunate than she is. This year we gave her a shoes box to fill with small toys and gifts to send to a little girl. She’s only 3 but it’s never too early to teach her how to be thankful, and not take her things for granted. We felt like starting her young would help her understand has she grows into a young lady and an adult that it is far better to give than receive. 

Thankful - Whitney Hanarhan

Thankful is a word that in the past I would use very loosely. The first Thanksgiving after my husband Kevin stepped on an IED, I truly realized what an emotionally packed word “thankful” actually was. The true meaning of this word sunk in harder than it ever had before. Even though we were living at a hospital and my husband was severely injured, he was ALIVE! I had him home safely and he was in recovery. Our daughter was able to hug her dad and I couldn’t have been more thankful for that.

Now 5 years and another child later, I still couldn’t be more Thankful. Not only for my husband still being here with us, but for all of the amazing memories that we have been able to make since his injury. Also this year I am working in the Heroes Thanking Heroes program which allows me to support my family by working from home. Working from home allows me to still be a caregiver to my husband and to continue building incredible memories with my family. 

This Thanksgiving we were able to spend time at our family’s cabin. We were able to be outdoors which is where our family is the happiest. Watching my husband with our children is one of the greatest blessings, seeing how their eyes light up when playing with him is the best gift I could ever receive . After almost losing my husband I have learned to live my life as if everything is a miracle, and always being aware of how much I truly have. I am thankful for my new outlook on life and how happy my family is. 

I may not know with certainty what’s going to happen from year to year, month to month, or even minute to minute. However, one thing I do know for sure is that this moment is something you can’t get back. Listen closely to others, create new memories, cherish past memories, hug the people you love tight, and love unconditionally in the present because things can change in the blink of an eye. 

Giving Thanks

What do I have to be thankful for? I am thankful to be alive. This Thanksgiving is like most, I had to have surgery, this time on my kidney. It seems like I’m always having surgery around the holidays. Being in the hospital really stresses me out, and that kind of stress is really a trigger for a PTSD panic attack.  I’m also extremely thankful for my wife. She can really read me, she knows how I’m feeling just by my facial expressions, she is truly the best caregiver for me. My wife made sure that my nurses were giving me my medications on time, and stayed next to me the whole stay to comfort me if I had a nightmare. I also was so thankful having family around. That usually relieves some of the stress I face daily. I have spent so many holidays training or deployed, being close to the ones I love the most makes the holidays so much more special. Hearing my own children and niece laugh really helped make the pain go away.

            When I was released from the hospital and was on the way home I could take some time to really realize how much I do have to be thankful for. My life, my family, the roof over my head, my freedom to enjoy the things that I like and to dislike the things that I don’t like (like being in the hospital).

            The thankfulness continued when I found out my daughter had flown home for Thanksgiving. She is active duty serving in the U.S Army, she makes me so proud and grateful that she chose to serve our country.  

As we ate dinner, engaged in conversation, laughed, and talked about everything, I could connect with my family. Something that has not been possible for quite some time, and slowly but surely I am making the progress to be healthier and happier for my family. 

The Importance of Voting - Diana Stone

Tuesday I took my 6-year-old daughter with me to vote. The days leading up, I’d tried to explain to her what this all meant, why voting was important, and what the president did. The more I explained, the more confused I became trying to break it down. Every question of hers led to a spin off in a hundred different directions, but we watched videos and read up on it together.

As we pulled up to the voting place, I felt nervous. I realize my vote is just that – one – but I also know that there are times just a few votes have made a significant difference in something. As we walked out, a young woman approached us with a smile that matched my unsteady one and asked, “Do you know where we vote?” I replied I wasn’t sure but that we could find someone to ask and for her to come with us if she’d like. We figured it out, and walked together into the building.

She seemed even more nervous than I was, holding her purse and asking questions. Did she need that voter registration card I was holding? Was her ID ok? Was she in the right precinct? I assured her that even if it was all wrong, the voting workers have a lot of options to help her vote as long as she was registered, and she relaxed a bit.

As we neared the front, she turned to me and smiled. “This is my first time voting in the U.S.,” she beamed. “I’m so excited. I don’t want to mess it all up.”

I felt excited for her. “Oh my goodness, how special! What an election to be able to vote in for the first time.”

She nodded and told me how she might have been able to vote at her college, but really wanted to drive to where her precinct was (45 minutes away). I asked her where she’d voted before.

“Mexico – it was so different there! We went into a garage and they have a booth, a sort of black curtain you put over your head, then look in and vote. I have wanted to vote so much here, I registered to vote in the primaries but I guess they didn’t process my application in time. So I said no matter what happens, I have to be able to vote today. I have been checking and calling to make sure I could.”

As I stood there waiting my turn, I felt a lump in my throat as she talked. Here was this young woman who had probably gone through much more than I, personally, had for the right to vote here. She had watched this whole election unfold and was determined to have a voice in it.

As we walked away, I looked back to give her a smile of encouragement. Then I snapped a picture with my daughter after I showed her how the voting machines worked, and we pressed the “SUBMIT” button together, put on our stickers, and walked out to see what would happen in a few hours.

I came out of that building with a much deeper appreciation for what this all means. Win, lose – it was an honor to be a part of something like this.

The Importance of Family - Juan Perez

Over the last 2.5 years our family has been on a journey that we were not at liberty to discuss with the world. Although it sounds very special ops and cool, the heart of the story is heartbreaking. Juan and I have always been firm believers that we are part of a bigger plan. We may not always understand what that plan is or agree with it but we know that we will never be given more than we can handle. August 23, 2013 Juan’s sister had her children taken from her and placed into the Oklahoma Department of Human Services system due to criminal activity in the home that placed them in danger. Juan did not have an active role in his sister’s life due to her lifestyle choices but we had always spoken to our niece through social media and telephone. We were notified shortly after the children were taken that the situation was very difficult and the kids may not be able to return to their Mother’s care. The state of Oklahoma told us that our niece would like to come live with us and that they would like to keep all three kids together, would we be able to take them all? We started getting our home certified for foster care to have the children placed with us in June of 2014.

 At the time my Husband was staying in Michigan caring for his adopted Mother who was dying from stage 4 cancer. We spent countless hours in training, flying Juan back and forth from Michigan for meetings, training, and to complete the certification process. We were completely certified and ready for the placement of the kiddos in August of 2014. We were kept in communication of the legal process and what was going on with the children however, the court continued to try to work on Juan’s sister’s situation to allow the kids to come back to her. In September of 2015 our youngest nephew was placed back in his Mother’s care while our niece ran away from the foster home that she was in. The supervisors on the case lost track of Juan’s sister and our nephew and were unable to find our niece. In October they found our nephew with his Mother at a Walmart after 30 days and he was in terrible condition. He was wearing soiled pants, no shoes or socks, covered in dirt and in a terrible emotional state. At the court hearing immediately following the state taking possession of our nephew again Juan’s sister terminated her own rights to the children. At that time our niece was still missing. We were no longer getting information on the kids because they had started the reunification process with his sister.

The state of Oklahoma reached out to us again at the beginning of January 2016 for assistance finding our niece and to see if we were still interested in taking the kiddos. We found our niece within 24 hours and had her at a foster home where she felt safe within 48 hours. Our home had to be recertified again because so much time had passed. Through this entire process we had the best case workers in Colorado that anyone could ask for. They recertified us in less than 45 days, we were ready to take on all three kiddos. As the day approached that the kids were going to be placed we were told that one of the kids was going to go to a different home, a home that we knew nothing about. We had prepped our children and our home for all three of these kids and it felt like the state and the system was running us in circles. One minute we are ready for the kids and they are not coming. The next minute we are taking three kids and now we are only getting two. The process is very long and very stressful.

When you think of this process for an individual that does not have any mental disabilities I am sure you can imagine how difficult it may be.  However, when you add a disabled veteran that is processing through his Mothers death, a veteran that has anxiety, ptsd, a TBI, and still lives his life very structured and planned, this chaos was something that we almost didn’t get through. We worked hard to maintain our daily lives with work and our own children but the stress of the entire process weighed heavily on us personally. Juan and I lean on each other for support in all aspects of life however the constant indecisiveness of this process was causing us both extreme anxiety. Every time we thought we were moving forward the caseworkers would change something and we would move three steps back. Finally, we took it upon ourselves to drive to Oklahoma to pick up our nephew and speed up the placement process.

May 1^st 2016 we picked up our nephew in Oklahoma and on May 20^th our niece was brought to our home by her foster family on a foster to adopt placement. No matter how prepared we believed we were, there was no way for us to be prepared for how this changed our lives. These kiddos have been through so much and both suffer from PTSD and anxiety which requires therapy and medication. Their needs sometime surpass our needs and at times are like my husband’s disabilities. The first 30 days were the most difficult. We had to report to two separate sets of case workers in two states. The kiddos had to have full medical and dental clearance and as it turned out they were not as healthy as we had been told. Both kids had to start therapy and have ongoing medical conditions that have to be monitored monthly. I am a caregiver from my core in every aspect of my life and at times I felt like I had taken on more than I could handle.

  To top it all off we also found out that Juan’s boxer had Lymphoma and would need to start chemotherapy. It seemed that the world was stacked against us, yet we kept our head up and knew that there was a plan bigger than what we understood. We worked hard to teach all the kids the ground rules and structure that we needed to incorporate two more kiddos into our home. We met with the caseworkers, we started the therapy for those that needed it, we kept our minds and hearts open so that hopefully we would see and understand the big picture. As the kids started to settle in and everyone started to get comfortable we had a new bombshell dropped. To get our Niece adopted we had to complete it before she was 18 or she was losing all her benefits of being a foster child for the last three years. Like I said before every time we thought we were moving forward we would get knocked three steps back.

There are always rules and regulations that govern foster homes and the adoption process and time was not on our side. Our niece was going to turn 18 before we were legally able to adopt her. Juan and I kept our faith and began advocating very strongly for our niece. At the family meeting in August the judge heard the issues we were facing and ordered the state to do whatever to make sure our niece was adopted by her birthday. The state of Oklahoma hired a private attorney to assist us in the process and were able to get an exemption to allow us to adopt her and her little brother the day before she turned 18 which will allow her to get and keep the benefits that she deserves for the hardship she endured.

As of October 19, 2016 we are now a family of 9. This adventure could have been the end of our marriage and family. The trials and tribulations that went with this process could have caused us to grow apart but one of the most important things that Juan and I have learned over the years is understanding of each other’s trigger points, strengths, and weaknesses. I know that he has a hard time with disorder and indecisiveness, so I handled as much as I could the things that were up in the air. I know that when I need things done Juan is very good at getting people to move and make decisions. Knowing these things about each other helped us in every aspect of this process. Although we hope that we are finished with foster care, case workers, attorneys, and lawyers we know that we have a criminal case that is still pending and one more kiddo that needs to be placed that doesn’t have a permanent home yet. Through everything we maintained a positive attitude and made sure that we kept the lines of communication open, no matter what was thrown at us we would survive this adventure together. Sometimes I believe we are stronger together because of his injury. As of today, we are a family of 9; perfectly imperfect individuals who are exactly where we are intended to be in life. 

Undefeated

My husband’s Alive Day just recently passed.  It’s been six years. Boy, how time does fly, but it really seems like a lifetime ago.  Prior to his injury, I would have never understood how those two could be used in the same sentence to describe something, until I had a child.  In the sense of describing how you blink an eye, and you can’t imagine your life prior to such a major event.  Except, the two things I am describing are on complete opposite ends of the spectrum, one is one of the worst things that can happen, and the other brings about a joy that I can’t put into words. 

I can’t imagine my life without my husband’s injury. I do find myself guilty of wondering sometimes how different his life, my life, and our daughter’s life would be if we were “normal.”  Then I think, if I could just take away his pain; never mind a normal life, just let him be pain free.  I will probably never stop wishing that for him.  However, I have come to realize that as far as our family goes, the grass is not greener on the other side.  As I sit and think about how far we as a family have come, and see the strides my husband has made in the past 6 years, I could not be more proud.  Instead of letting his injury defeat him, he fights back EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.

I see him struggle to sleep at night, and then struggle to get up in the morning because he hasn’t slept but for 2 hours.  But he gets up, and he goes to school, and then he comes home and plays with our daughter.  He has a will power that is unbreakable, and it’s unbelievable to me. He doesn’t want to be defeated, but he also wants to help other soldiers and veterans not be defeated.  There are some days he does not win, but as the years go on, those days are fewer and farther between.  He does not let his injury define him, he has used it as motivation, to help motivate others that got dealt a bad card.  For that he will always be someone I look up to and strive to be like, my hero!

An Alive Day in the Daughenbaugh Family

Most Americans only get to celebrate the day they came into the world once a year. A Birthday is common practice and celebrates the change from youth to life, long lived. For me, being a combat wounded Marine; I get to celebrate two days of coming into the world. One that I thank my mom and dad for and the other, that I thank God, our Navy Corpsman and my fighting spirit for.

On October 12, 2004 I was on a foot patrol with my Marines and our base came under mortar attack. It wasn’t unusual and happened regularly. This time though, my squad was in the area believed to be a traveled route for those launching the attacks. After we established a vehicle checkpoint and had several successful stops, I didn’t know it yet but my family would learn to embrace this day as the day my fighting spirit, mixed with divine intervention would stave off me, losing my life. I had been shot in the face, the bullet stopped in unreachable spot near my brain and my Marines thought I was going to die. That was 12 years ago and as I write this, my 12^th alive day is just around the corner.

Every year on my alive day my family treats it as an actual second birthday. We spend time together as a family, we go to dinner and cherish that I’ve been given another year with them. My family has been the driving force behind my recovery and my avoidance of the common pitfalls that cause some wounded veterans to succumb to: dark nightmares, horrific flashbacks, survivor guilt and even suicide. I’ve dealt with nightmares and occasional flashbacks but I’ve never considered the worst. I live with chronic pain and the fear of seizures which are debilitating but I’m living my life to the fullest. I have to, I’ve been giving a second chance at life and the best way to deal with that is to live for those we’ve lost and lead a life my children will be proud to have been part of.

My “alive day” is a day to celebrate a second chance at life. To learn from and grow from the worst thing that’s ever happened to me.  

Extended Family

Service Dog - A service animal means any dog that is individually trained to do work or perform tasks for the benefit of an individual with a disability, including a physical, sensory, psychiatric, intellectual, or other mental disability.

Many of our wounded veterans rely on a service animal daily. So much that the animal becomes a part of them, and extension of their emotions, physical abilities, and sometimes mental disabilities. These dogs are trained to help with the laundry, be a blind persons eyes, be emotional comfort for someone who is struggling with depression or anxiety, and they can even call 911. These dogs can even sense seizures and give the owner a warning sign to sit down because they are about to experience a seizure. The possibilities are endless with these sweet and helpful dogs, and they become more like family than they do a pet or a "co-worker". Service pets have saved so many lives because of how alert they are trained to be and how much comfort they are trained to provide, even though most dogs are very giving and comforting anyways.

Here is a recent event where one veteran's service dog, Charlie, came to his rescue. Thanks to Charlie's training to be one with his person, he was able to get him help and to the hospital before things could have gotten worse.

As I was thinking what to write about for the blog, an issue arose that gave me great inspiration, my service dog, “Charlie”. Charlie is 5 years old now and has been a part of my family for three years. Whenever I’m feeling Blue or have had a surgery, Charlie has always been by my side. He is a faithful friend and service dog. This past weekend, I had a sharp pain, and found myself struggling to walk. Charlie ran to me and licked me to let me know that he acknowledges that I need help, and ran off to get my wife. Charlie was able to get my wife’s attention because I was in such agony that it hurt to even talk. Charlie and my wife both came to my aid, thanks to Charlie's training and ability to notify someone when I need help.

I ended up spending the night in the hospital. I had developed kidney stones.  Charlie came with me to the hospital and never left my side until I was discharged. Charlie was well behaved and licked my hand to comfort me when I needed it. Charlie is just as my family as my wife and children.

*Always remember, and remind your children, that if you see someone with a service dog, not to pet it. When the dog is working, it needs to be in full focus at all times and can not have any distractions. If a young child does want to pet the animal, always ask the owners permission first. It is at the owners discretion if they want their animal pet or not.* 

The 22

You are probably wondering what "The 22" means. Well, 22 is the number of veterans who take their own life every day. Veterans struggle with depression, loneliness, hopelessness, and all sorts of emotions that drive them to feel they are a burden and take their own lives. There are long lines at the VA and limited resources, some don't have a family to lean back on and the support they so desperately need.

This certainly is a daunting subject, but there needs to be awareness. September is "Suicide Awareness" month. And as this month is coming to a close it's important to remember that, no one deserves to feel like they should take their own life, especially our veterans. All life is precious, no matter skin color, gender, profession, religion, and other choices in life that we may make.

If you or someone you know is thinking out harming themselves, please call a trained specialist who will talk to you confidentially and give you the reasons why you shouldn't harm yourself.

This is one of the national listed suicide prevention hotline numbers: 1-800-273-8255

The Website is: http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
The website has a specific tab for veterans.

Remember every day to be kind to strangers, you never know if something as simple as a caring smile could turn someones life around.

The Patriot’s Day Run

This past weekend my husband and I took part in the Run Bling Repeat Virtual race that is set up to help support wounded veterans and their families through the Coalition to Salute America’s Heroes. We purchased our run online, printed out our bib’s and we were out the door to run our 6.2 miles. It was a hot 91-degree day with 100% humidity, which for most avid runners is tough but we managed.  Running has been a big part of my life for the last few years. Running has given me the ability to manage my anxiety while relieving stress so that I can be the best wife and mother I can be. As a caregiver it’s necessary to care for yourself. Setting aside time for you each day allows you to take better care of your loved ones. As a wife and caregiver I don’t leave my home much during the week and I have very little adult interaction as well during the week unless I’m on the phone for work.  This sometimes creates seclusion and a little bit of depression. Being able to put on my running shoes and have time to myself makes all the difference in the world.

Now, not all the time do my husband and I run together. He’s much faster than me and at times too motivational. The type of motivation that can get someone a little angry if they’re not feeling the run or don’t have the energy to keep pushing forward. But today we ran together. This was in honor of many things. To remember lives lost so tragically on 9-11, to continue to support the brave men and woman who continue to put their lives on line and the ones who paid the ultimate sacrifice so that we can continue to live free.

My husband is a Marine who was injured during a foot patrol back in 2004 in Iraq. He took a bullet to the face, breaking his jaw and stopping 1 cm before entering his brain. To this day the bullet resides near his brain surrounded by around all major nerves making surgery impossible to remove it. The bullet and his injury cause him daily pain and is reminder that he will forever be a wounded veteran. Many of our family and friends know that my husband does not allow his injury to define who he is as husband, father or Marine. Every day he pushes himself to do better and be better for himself and our family. On our run this weekend he did just that. He not only pushed himself but he pushed me. I complained multiple times on wanting to stop due extreme heat exhaustion but he wouldn’t let me. He reminded me each time that we’re not doing this for us, and each time it would bring things back into perspective for me and I would continue running. Right before our run my husband grabbed our American Flag that hangs in our front yard as you will see in the picture. We received waves, thumbs up and some would honk their horn showing their support, other’s would just stare wondering what we were doing but for me, I felt pride and so much love for my husband. Not only for what he has done but for what he continues to do today in helping our wounded veterans and their families. It was also very overwhelming at times, knowing things could have been very different for our family if he never came home.

We started and finished together.


When I told Donny that I was going to add something he said to the story, he said: “It was hot, it was tough but it was worth it. The medal says “Let’s roll” which is what the passengers said before they attempted to overtake the terrorists on flight 93. That flight crashed and all lives were lost. Their actions inspired me and the memory of all the lives lost at Ground Zero motivated me. The spirit of service members who’ve bravely given their lives in defense of America in the Global War on Terror carried me. It was tough but it was for the right reasons, quitting wasn’t an option”.

Beach Week - Jennifer Urbany

My husband Donald, myself, and our children had the opportunity of a lifetime to go to Bethany Beach in Delaware on a retreat put on by Operation Seas The Day. This event is meant to be a week of relaxation and full of appreciation for our wounded veterans and family. We were welcomed by a huge gathering at the local VFW, where there was a ceremony and lunch dedicated to thanking the families, then we were escorted to the condo that was donated by the owner, where we would be staying for the week. The condo was beautiful and had an amazing view of the ocean. The fridge and pantries were already stocked with food and there were gifts laid out for Donald, the kids, and me. The local businesses, and restaurants donated free meals for the veterans and their families, as well as the put put golf course and arcade holding a family night for all of the families who wanted to participate. There was a party and gathering every day just to honor us and the other veterans, and for the community to show how much they appreciated our service.

View from our room

Our host, Mike

We had so many great stories to share, from walking on the board walk and shopping, to being honored in a parade through Bethany Beach while the entire city stood by to wave, show love and appreciation. I went on a spa day where I received a massage, and manicure. Donald and our oldest son Bennett, got to go golfing. Every family was assigned a host family that helped the families, and show them around.  We by far had the best host ever, he drove me around the Tanger outlets while I shopped, he took the boys and Donald to do whatever they wanted to do while I was at the salon, and could not put our littlest one, Lincoln, down. It was the longest time in a while I have been able to eat with two hands. We all enjoyed the ocean, playing in the sand, and being so warmly welcomed by the locals. Operation Seas the Day wanted the vacation to be completely at no cost to  us, so they gave all the families a gift card to shop and to pay for any other extras we may want or incur. They even gave us parking passes to park where ever we wanted! Everywhere in Bethany beach had a parking meter. The local police even gave us passes...as long as we weren't being wreckless, we technically had a "get out of a ticket" free pass. (How cool is that? That doesn't happen everyday.)

Watching the concert

The parade was amazing, everyone in attendance, was escorted by police and fire trucks in buses to a venue where we were treated to a dinner and Bruce Springsteen cover band concert that had fireworks at the end to just add to the celebration. Flags were flying every where, people standing on the street, people waving and saying thank you, it all was just so overwhelming and humbling to see so many people really care about the sacrifice that our service members and families have made. We  have never seen a town so dedicated to our veterans, and wish more places were like Bethany Beach, DE.

Playing at the bay 

We were treated to a boat ride to Assateague to see the wild ponies, and play in the bay.  We had a picnic lunch on the shore and splashed in the water. That was an experience that made life long memories for the us. The boys absolutely loved the boat ride, the owners of the boat even allowed the boys to drive the boat, that completely made the their day. Seeing the smiles on their faces just made it all the more better.

Lunch and Dinner parties happened every day. All the families were treated like VIP's, we were all waited on hand and foot, there were so many things to do and so much food to eat! Even the Governor and Mayor of the town showed up to these dinner and lunch events! One lunch included the local girls soccer team showing support by sponsoring and being our waitresses for a barbecue lunch, and one dinner included photographers taking family portraits that would have otherwise cost hundreds of dollars for free.

There was also time where the caregivers and veterans spent time apart in meetings where they could relate to each other and discuss resources for support and various other important information with one another. It was a confidential setting where we could vent, relate, and talk about the similarities and differences in our lives with out veterans. Sometimes when you think you are the only one dealing with an issue, it's comforting to know that there are others walking the same mile in your shoes.

We also made memories at the beach, boogie boarding, playing in the sand, dipping our toes in the water and the boys burying their daddy in the sand.

Then there was the closing ceremony on Sunday. The local fire station hosted a breakfast for all the families in attendance to thank us one last time for our service. There was a moment of silence for all of those who lives were lost on 9/11, then the hosts of the event went on to recognize all the veterans and gave us caregivers flowers. We all took a picture together to remember the whole event and the friends we made, hugged each other, hugged our host (who I could not thank enough for holding my 9 month hold so much so I could remember what have two arms felt like), put some gas in our car and drove home with some lifelong amazing memories and a once in a lifetime experience.

Look at that form! 

We made it! 

Bennett's first oyster

9/11 Where were you? - Joan Cadena

If you ask any American where they were when they heard we had been attacked September 11^th, they can tell you. Most of them will even follow it by saying,” I remember it like it was yesterday.” When someone even says 9/11, it brings back emotions I can remember as if I was finding out for the first time all over again.  I remember the day perfectly, I was in middle school, just finished gym class and the period was almost over. Then our principal came over the PA system announcing our nation had just attacked. I then went to my next class where the teachers tried to keep structure, but there was a distinct ambiance throughout the school, our day came to a complete halt.  The classrooms that had a television had the news on, I’m sure some of the teachers and some of the students even watched as the second plane hit.  The teachers tried to keep it together, but did not attempt to keep the normal lesson plan going. We were living a day that we so often read about in the history books.  I remember my mom picking me up from school and thinking, what a beautiful day it was in Ohio, almost perfect actually. As I rolled down my window in 70 degree weather and let the breeze hit my face admiring the flawless blue skies with thick white puffy clouds, sunshine, I tried to comprehend what was happening in New York, the Pentagon and Pennsylvania.  My whole body was overcome with anger, sadness and confusion.

As we ate dinner on Sunday, my husband said “I still get angry about this day,” and I just thought to myself and then said out loud “you know, so do I.”. This may be true for many, and not for some others.  But then I started to think, how many joined the military after September 11^th? How many people lost family members in the planes, in the towers, our first responders?  It has been said to be the deadliest attack for law enforcement and police officers in the history of the United States.  That is not even counting the soldiers we have lost in the war since.  I watched a statement that George Bush made about the attacks that day and it was something along the lines of, “we hear you”, speaking to the organization responsible for this heinous act of terrorism, and then stated “NOW, YOU WILL HEAR US!”.

As a nation that day we came together like I’ve never experienced before, or since.  It was a wave of togetherness felt around the nation.  It was like a double edge sword, it ^th I just want to bring to mind all of the innocent lives lost that day show gratitude to all of our past and present firefighters, police officers, military members who protect and serve.

was amazing, but disgusting at the same time.  The reason I mention this is because that togetherness I am talking about I see among the military and veteran community.  Not only do the veterans look out for each other, there are amazing organizations like the Coalition that help to make sure our veterans and their families don’t sink in the aftermath of  tragedy.  I really don’t know where we would be at today if we didn’t have other fellow veterans and the Coalition to help, and that is something that can never be taken away, ever.  So in light of the anniversary September 11^th I just want to bring to mind all of the innocent lives lost that day show gratitude to all of our past and present firefighters, police officers, military members who protect and serve.

Labor Day

We recently celebrated Labor Day.  So many people think of Labor Day as simply a day off of work to celebrate the end of Summer.  The day isn’t about recognizing a specific person, group, or event but rather America’s workforce as a whole and the many achievements that have been contributed to our society. 

Before my husband lost three limbs in Afghanistan, I was a full-time employed mother of a newborn baby and the wife of a deployed serviceman.  All too often, I didn’t have the opportunity or luxury of taking a day off, let alone actually spending it relaxing.  The day I received the phone call (October 9^th, 2010) saying my husband was injured was a day that I walked away from a management position of a job I had held for 8 years. I had worked with the company since first getting my driver’s license and some of the employees practically raised me and became family.

After months went by with my husband’s recovery, I quickly began to realize that our situation would be a life-long process.  Granted my husband is strong-willed, over-achieving and typically tries to do everything on his own, I knew in my heart it was going to be extremely difficult for me to ever return to a job that I would be working 40+ hours a week along with raising our daughter.  This terrified me.  I needed to work for my sanity and well-being.  I needed to feel like I was contributing to society.

Today, I feel very blessed to have found the Heroes Thanking Heroes program. I have regained confidence and social aspects of my life that I had lost during our hard times.  I’m able to make a steady income for my family and still have a flexible schedule with the ability to work from home in case my family needs me.  I flourished into a team lead position and have the opportunity to work with some of the most incredible veterans and caregivers.   

We celebrated Labor Day very simply this year. My husband and I each chose something that would make us each feel accomplished of our work.  Generally, I would be completely against the idea of paying a housekeeper to clean our home.  This was my gift to myself this year.  The relief of coming home Monday afternoon to a beautifully clean house was worth so much more to me than the hard earned money I spent to make it happen.  My husband, being the avid hunter that he is, requested that we spend the evening in the woods welcoming opening weekend of archery season.  Though we didn’t make it more than a couple of hours due to the heat and boredom of a 6 year old, I could tell that he was beyond happy just having us there with him in the hunting blind. It’s the small things that mean the most.

By: Ashlee Williams

Road to Recovery

Registration is open for the 2016 Road to Recovery Conference. Veterans who have attended this event in the past have described as healing, educational, comforting, and life changing. There are job fairs, resources for coping with injuries, help and support for the families that attend, good food ;), and people there who understand you and can relate to you because they have been where you have been. They have either come through it stronger, or are still in recovery and have walked the same mile in your shoes that you have walked in theirs.

The requirements for this event are, you must have sustained one injury in combat during OIF//OEF/OND that is rated 30% or greater.

If you meet those qualifications, register!

Here is the link to register:

https://saluteheroes.org/get-help/r2r-conference/

The Coalition Gave Me My Confidence Back

I can remember the last time I went to a theme park. It was when the family and I attended a Road to Recovery in San Diego.  That was a big step for me, as I have a tendency to avoid big crowds.

Today I’m in the Heroes thanking Heroes program and taking steps to build new memories for my family.  My boys are nine and two years of age. 

The thing that is different is my daughters are in there 20’s and remember the pain of receiving the call of me being wounded. They remember the countless surgeries to follow. My boys have no clue; they just remember how I am now while my daughters remember how I was before, different.

I try to do my best to make things different for them, like trying out the things I used to be comfortable doing. For my sons ninth birthday, we went to LEGOLAND! Something I would have never done hadn’t been for the confidence that my wife tells me I’ve shown since working for the Coalition.

I Just want to say thank you and always remember to build those new memories no matter how small or how big. The memories mean the world to the family, when you put yourself out there and try.  

The Summer Funnies!

Stop that! Leave the cat alone! The dog is NOT a horse! Stay out of the fish tank! Don't pick the baby up! You just ate lunch, how are you hungry again? Don't hit your brother! What was that noise? No, you can't have that candy! Share with your brother/sister! Get off the table!  No! No! NO! I'm trying to work!

Our reps work from home. It's so they can take care of their veteran, have a bit of income, and so they can possibly move on to other at home call centers that are similar to the one they work on with the Heroes Thanking Heroes program. Most of us have children, and we work from home to call and thank donors for their support, and just give some updates on how their generous contributions help us help veterans.

So here are some humorous stories from our reps when they tried to work while the kids were on summer break.

Christine Thompson - Christine has two daughters ages 14 and 8 and when she works she goes into her office and tells her how long she's going to be working and to keep the noise down to a minimum. One day she was working and one of her daughters came in her office screaming, "CHLOE JUST POOPED ON THE FLOOR". Of course she did, no one had let her out since Christine did.  And as luck would have it, Christine was mid call, go figure right? Christine sat down with her daughter explained that she had to keep it down while mom was working, that she's not being mean, just trying to explain the rules. At the time, Christine was so fuming mad...but now, all that can be done is laugh!

Liz Snell - Someone asked Liz who watches her kids? She responds, "we use the dog as the sitter". Looks like the dog takes his job seriously!  ;)

Talia Hawkins - The kids run in and say "Grandma needs a bandaid!"!  I was on a call with a veteran trying to get their email address when one of the kids ran in yelling loudly that "Grandma needs a bandaid!"

Jennifer Urbany - I was in the middle of writing up a blog entry when my oldest comes running in, blood in his mouth, and exclaimed proudly, "MOMMY I RIPPED MY TOOTH OUT THE TOOTH FAIRY IS COMING!"! I don't know about you, but I used to get a dollar for my teeth. Due to inflation, I think she pays $5 per tooth now. 

Lacy Mullen - We moved into our new house this summer and thankfully it came with a sound proof office! I love my four kids with everything I have and when I'm free they want nothing to do with me but, go figure soon as Mommy gets busy working they are right there wanting all my attention!! Now they can yell for Mom all day at the door and I just smile and wave through the sound proof window while I work away!????

A Vacation is Always Good For The Soul

My family and I spent some time up in the Upper Peninsula by Lake Superior. I don’t know what it is about this place. But my veteran is relaxed here.

My first weekend up there, was a little stressful. But week two, was calm.

We enjoyed time together, laughed with each other, something that we haven’t done in a long time. Maybe it’s because there isn’t a lot of traffic up there. I don’t know.

Our everyday life tends to be stressful. He doesn’t really like to go anywhere, unless he is with family.

We spent the day on the beach, had lunch and just chilled with our five kid’s.  Took a walk into town and went to a few historical buildings. Had ice cream with the kid’s then went swimming in Lake Superior. Normally the lake is too cold to swim in, this summer, it was perfect!

My kid’s had a great time, seeing their dad laugh and smile sure does make them happy.

I cherish these moments. I cherish them because this week up north on our family vacation, we were whole and it felt amazing. No stress, no triggers, no arguing. Just love and happiness! 

Come here my love, let me whisper in your ear.

I want to tell you the reason I keep you near.

With you, I know and feel comfort.

Come here my love, let me hold you in my arms.

I want to reassure you, you’re all I need.

I know I tend to push you away. Please stay.

Come here my love, let me kiss your lips.

I need to kiss away your fears.

Like you have done for me time and again.

Come here my love, forever!

-Kacy Revord

Rob Jones - Paralympics Bronze Medalist

Are you watching the 2016 Rio Olympics?

As nearly 29 million people worldwide tune in to watch the best athletes of the 200 member countries, we at the Coalition wanted to catch up with our own Paralympic bronze medalist and combat wounded Marine Corps hero, Rob Jones.

Rob Jones. The everyday hometown hero that went to Afghanistan to serve his country; he came home a bilateral above the knee amputee as the result of an IED explosion. He decided that the loss of his legs wasn’t the loss of his life and his survival inspired him to become an amazing adaptive athlete. Rob’s bronze medal in Paralympic rowing (mixed double sculls) came only 2 years after he was critically wounded. Rob’s partner has an amazing story herself.

Oksana Masters a young women who was adopted from the Ukraine by a single mom at the age of 7. She became a double amputee as a result of deadly radiation from the horrific 1986 Chernobyl disaster that caused severe birth defects; she has strived to live life to the fullest, not letting her disability define her. She’s an internationally decorated athlete in cycling, rowing and skiing. Her performance earned Oksana the 2012 US. Rowing’s ‘Woman of the Year.’

When asked about what the training looks like reach the Olympic competitive level, Rob says “its four years full of sacrifice.” Athletes begin an intense 4 year training regimen that causes them to miss weddings, vacations, personal relationships and sums it up by saying “You might lose friends but that’s what it takes, you have to  put the Olympics first.” The training depends on the athlete and the sport but generally includes aerobic, anaerobic and eventually (just prior to competing) peeking. This is overexerting oneself to push your fitness level as high as possible. This training takes place 6 to 7 days a week and is around 25 hours per week, what a demanding job!

We asked Rob what it felt like to make it to the medal stand.

“You’ve got all the stresses leading up to competing” Rob says. “You’re representing your country, everyone who supports you and the culmination of all your training but when you make it to the medal stand, you get to relax and be care free.” 

Rob what and who are you watching for in the Rio games?

“I’m watching the rowing because of experience and understanding of the sport but whatever’s on, I like it all. All things American!”

In conclusion Rob was asked if there are any surprises for him in the 2016 Rio games. Rob says there were a few tennis upsets he didn’t expect but really he loves what he’s seeing.


A notable quote from a true American hero Rob says “American women have more freedoms than most other countries in the world and that shows because they’re really kicking ass this year!”  We don’t disagree and are proud of our American athletes this year, as America leads with 67 current medals, 26 of which are gold!

Rob’s next quest would challenge even the world’s toughest Iron Man. They only swim, run and bike (1) Marathon! Stay tuned.

Juan Perez - The Good Times Too

There are bad days and there are good days in every life. Sometimes for a Disabled veteran and their family there are more bad days than good. At our house we make a conscious effort to ensure that we have more good days than bad. Sometimes that means making a joke and laughing through the struggles, other times that means putting everything off and going to watch a movie as a family, occasionally it means spending the weekend doing fun things with great friends that are visiting from out of state at just the right time. Some of you know that our family is in the middle of one difficult event after another the last few months and 2016 has defiantly been a trying year for us, however, I can tell you that it has also been one of the best years as well. We work hard to focus our thoughts on the positive and how we are growing and changing individually and as a family. At the end of July Colorado Springs had a terrible storm that damaged many homes, cars, and neighborhoods including ours. Although we lost a few windows and have substantial damage we had an exciting weekend ahead with some dear friends that we were looking forward to. We patched up the broken windows, filled the insurance claims and spent 2 days having a blast with the Daughenbaughs. I love wood work and spent a few days prepping for Donny and Sarah to get here by making a custom Texans sign for Sarah. Apparently she has poor taste in football teams and this is her favorite team. Only kind of playing about the team choice thing. We all got up EARLY Sunday morning to do the incline. The incline is a Colorado Springs attraction that we love to go on ourselves. It is a one mile stair hike straight up a mountain that overlooks Colorado Springs. The hike is difficult to say the least but it is one activity that we love to do. We also explored Garden of the gods and took some amazing photos and climbed some fun rocks. At a time that could have been very stressful and we could have allowed the world to beat us down we choose to celebrate a great friendship that has grown over the years. We sat around a fire pit and made s’mores with our children, we ran on a secret mission to surprise a kiddo with a book that she really wanted, we cooked breakfast for an army of children, and shared drinks at a hopping bar and grill for the first time. Life literally is what you make and we are choosing to make the best of it no matter what is coming our way. I hope everyone takes a minute to focus on the GOOD that is in everyday and the good things in life like Great friends and the beauty of the outdoors

U.S. Veterans in the 2016 Rio Olympics

Our United States veterans are undoubtedly heroes. They protect our country from enemies foreign and domestic, and serve by preserving our constitutional rights to live in a free country.

Did you know that some of our heroes are going on to serve our country in a different way? That's right! They have gone to the 2016 Olympic games in Rio!

Here is a list of the veterans to look out for:

USMC 2nd Lieutenant David Higgins - Shooting -  50m rifle prone, he competes on August 12th

Army Sgt. First Class Keith Sanderson - Shooting - 25m rapid fire pistol, he competes August 12-13th

Army Sgt. First Class Michael McPhail - Shooting - 50m rifle prone, he competes August 12th

Army Sgt. First Class Glen Eller - Shooting - Double trap - he competes August 10th

Army Sgt. First Class - Josh Richmond - Shooting - Double Trap - he competes August 10th

Army Spc. Dan Lowe - Shooting - 10m Air Rifle - He competes today August 8th

Army Veteran and two time Olympic gold medalist Vincent Hancock - Skeet - he competes August 13th

Air Force First Lieutenant Cale Simmons - Track and Field - Pole Vault - he competes August 13 -20th

Army Second Lieutenant Sam Kendricks - Track and Field - Pole Vault - he competes August 13-20th

Army Staff Sgt. John Nunn - Track and Field - 50K Race Walk - he competes August 19th

Army Spc. Leonard Korir - Track and Field - 10,000m Run - he competes August 12-13th

Army Spc. Shadrack Kipchirchir - Track and Field - 10,000m Run - he competes August 12-13th

Army Spc. Paul Chelimo - Track and Field - 5,000m Run - he competes August 20th

Arm Sgt. Hillary Bor - Tack and Field - 3,000m Steeple Chase - she competes August 15th and 17th

Army Sgt. Nathan Schrimsher - Modern Pentathalon- he competes August 18th and 20th

Navy Lt. Edward King - Rowing - he competes August  6-13th

We want to wish ALL of the athletes who are competing for the United States of America in the Olympics this year good luck!

The U.S. already has 13 gold medals!

Lets keep up the good work heroes!

Kacy Revord - Love Can Conquer PTSD

My name is Kacy Revord and I’m a caregiver to my husband. I have been married to my veteran Charles, for almost 13 years now. I have loved him for 18 years. He is my high school sweetheart. We have 5 children together. Four daughters and one son.

My husband joined the Marine Corps in Jan. 2001. He had no idea, that when he joined, that Sept. 11^th would happen and make such a huge change in his life.

I was not with him at the time. We decided six month’s prior to put “us” on hold. He joined the service, I went and found a job and started living my own life.

Aug. 2003, after he got home from his first tour to Iraq, he called me out of the blue. “Hey you, how are you?”.  Hearing his voice, like always, melted my heart. We talked a little bit. Then he asked me to marry him. I said, YES! Four months later. We said, I do!

I had no idea what PTSD was, no idea what war did to people. I do know that I loved him just the same as our high school days. I guess, I thought…I’m so happy, I got the man of my dreams. I did, I love him so much. The reality of his tour to Iraq came when I got my first calls from him. (I was in Michigan and he was in CA, stationed at Camp Pendleton). He was drunk! He was drinking Jack Daniels, drink of choice by Marine’s. He was saying things that broke my heart. He told me, I need you here. So I moved out to CA.

It wasn’t all roses and champagne. It was more heart break and tears. I didn’t leave because I loved him. I didn’t leave, because I believed in the words we said to each other on our wedding day, “for better or worse.”

He left for Iraq, his second tour 2004. I was pregnant. I was very emotional, I wrote almost every day, and awaited those few and far between phone calls.

When he came back early 2005. He got to meet his daughter for the first time.

He seemed very humbled when he got back but there were times when he wasn’t. I still didn’t understand PTSD. I just thought, what a jerk.

We moved back home to Michigan.

Present day.

My husband has severe PTSD. He is in counseling. Life is not perfect here. It would be nice if it was, but it’s not. You can read about PTSD and watch programs on how to help. But each person is different. I don’t ask my husband about war, I let him talk to me when he wants to talk.

I reread his awards from time to time. When I read the words, “He courageously charged across an open field into the hostile position, exposing himself to enemy fire and fatally wounded the remaining insurgent”. I am thankful to have him home with me. Although I try to understand that he has pain, I will never know the depth of it.  

With the pain that he carries. He tends to push me away.

There are times, I feel I am defeated. Broken down to nothing. I wonder, is this it. I love him yes, but why, if he loves me, does he make me feel like nothing. Here is this man who never in our youth, ever, hurt my feelings. He protected me and made me feel loved. Now, his words cut me to my core.

I have sat with him and talked it out. We could have a great day at home. But it never failings, before he goes to bed, he has to say something, anything really to hurt me.

Two months ago, our two older girls told him, “Dad you’re mean to mom, why do you try so hard to hurt her”. I guess it got him thinking. A few days later, he came out and said, I verbally abuse you honey. It’s not okay, it was never okay. I don’t know why, but I know it has to stop. We started going to counseling and we are working on “us” together. It isn’t and hasn’t been an easy road. It’s hard and sometimes I want to grab my kid’s and run. But to be honest. I really don’t want to run. I love this man. War has hurt him and I pray that in time love will rebuild him, us, our family!

I am thankful for my husband. No matter how hard the struggles, we have five amazing kids and love that “we” want to last.

I have noticed with all the stress that he goes through, his triggers, have become my triggers. I have been consumed with the stress of who, where, what will lead to him being overwhelmed. I stopped doing things for me and along the way, I lost my identity. I work from home, which I’m thankful for my job with the Coalition to Salute America’s Heroes. With the support I get from the whole team, I have started believing in myself again. I want to feel whole. Then guilt starts to sink in, because he does not feel whole. I’m learning that it’s fine to want to do things without him. Its fine to want to smile and laugh with other’s. One day, he may want to do the fun things, smile and laugh and just be happy again. I started writing poems again. Here is one, I hope you like it! Thank you for taking the time to read this.

Silently I’m broken, you cannot see my pain. I will hide it, while out in the open. The words that you say, echo in my brain, feeling like I’m nothing. Well…it left a stain. Sometimes I feel ashamed. I cannot see or know your pain. But I am only human and want what we used to be. –Kacy Revord