On April 4th, 2004 SPC Jimmy Batchelor survived a gunshot wound to the head while serving in Sadr City, Iraq in a firefight that would become known as Black Sunday. The following is a letter from Jim Batchelor US Army Ret. In 2023 To Specialist Jimmy Batchelor on April 5th, 2004. 
To Specialist Batchelor,
Hey Batch, tough day right? I mean, it’s not every day you get shot in the head, knocked around a Bradley by RPG’s, die and wake up in a body bag. Your ego is going to sustain you for quite a while, I mean, of course, you made it through that. You’re 1st Cav, God loves the Infantry and every single thing that can fit on a bumper sticker. But you haven’t closed your eyes yet. You haven’t had the quiet time when you have to process it and well, I’m sorry.
Let me start by saying I’m you. Not the “I’m you” from self-help books but, literally you. I know how you got that scar on your hand from your brother trying to pin you to a piece of wood with a nail, how you got the scar on your throat by trying to go under barbed wire on a motorcycle, I know all of it because I’m really you. I know how you ran from Christ at the age of 16 and were brought back to your knees on Sand Hill because you were finally alone and you felt that desolation for the first time and cried out for your Redeemer and were calmed.
You’re going to go through that again. But it’s going to get a lot worse. So much worse. Let me fill you in. When we get back from Germany, we aren’t going to be the same. The nightmares are going to be constant; the anger is going to be constant. You’ve never been an angry person before, never understood those who were but well, from 20 or so years in the future... it’s a dog we get to keep leashed.
What next? Ah yes, your wife. She’s not going to like this angry, hateful person who is suddenly medicated and bouncing between hateful and forgetful and you’re not going to like her. Actually, it’s going to go far beyond not liking. You know that joke about “If your wife isn’t happy long enough, you’re going to be unhappy with half of your stuff?” There’s a reason everyone divorced laughs about it. It’s true. You’re going to think giving her everything is the best trade in the world to get away.
While you’re not sleeping and you’re raging, the Army is going to fast-track you out. Shot in April, out by November, and then you’re going to get run over by an 18-wheeler a few days before your final out-processing. The Army will throw 30% at you and everyone who got injured that day just to kick you out but don’t worry. There will be a huge lawsuit and well, they’ll bump it up to 50.
Batch, you’ll be without a home of your own for a long while. You’ll sleep one night on someone’s couch, and another on a floor but the nightmares and rage just won’t let anyone get close. That connection you had with God in Basic? You’ll rage against that as well.
Jim... you will learn hatred and it will become a part of your soul. Darkness will move in that you’ve only read about. And it’ll almost kill you one day sitting on a couch in an empty house, desperate for a connection forgetting who you are, forgetting what you are.
So I’m reaching back all of these years to tell you. To tell you what to look forward to.
You will put that destruction away because a girl on the other side of the planet offers to trade a picture of her smiling if you’ll just hold on for 24 hours. And it will be the best trade you’ve ever heard of. And she’ll do this for weeks until you can see light. A veteran’s organization will hear about you and Black Sunday (yes, they literally call it this and make a miniseries out of it) will furnish that empty house and you bring that girl to it and find you can’t live without her.
Oh and Batch, you learn what marriage really is. It isn’t the “I’m home for 2 days and gone a month and we never talk” that you once had, it’s talking at 2 am about nothing at all. It’s tough decisions and kids. Oh, the kids. You’ll have kids. I know you never wanted them but man, having them is the most absolutely insane and difficult and rewarding thing you’ll ever do.
And you’ll find yourself back on your knees before the Throne. Your rage at God will move to gratitude. The book of Job will take a new meaning and you’ll see why you were driven down that path of pain and suffering and then had everything restored in spades. There’s redemption there Batch, but before that, there’s always pain. There’s always blood. And we have to go through it and it’s going to suck massively.
From 2023 I’m reaching back to you in 2004. You’re in Germany with Jason sitting there beside you talking about how best to spend that 250-dollar card the Army gave you to buy new clothes because yours were destroyed due to contamination. That’s how they label your blood and the blood of your friends. Contamination. But it’s fitting. It’s going to soak into your soul and it’s going to take years but it will give you insight into how people hurt and other veterans who have seen what you have. You will separate from people who you thought were friends and family and develop new ones and that’s okay. Sleep will become someone you used to know but that’s handy when you have kids. You’re always listening for them.
Batch, you have a lot of healing to do. A lifetime of it. You’re going to get a lot of advice on what to do and a lot of it is from people who have never been where you are but read a book or have a degree. I’m telling you from here. Open Job. Read what he went through and understand you will walk the same path. Take comfort because it’s going to hurt but know there is a reason. I can promise you there is a reason. Sanctification is on the other side of it. Neat word there don’t you think? I’m working on becoming a pastor. Yes, infantry to seminary. I told you, that path is a long and twisty one and we can’t see around the curve but He can. Every drop of blood you spilled and every hour you suffer has meaning. It is counted and accounted for. Find peace in that and in the one who died for us. I wish I could save you the walk you’re about to make but then I wouldn’t have done it. All I can say is He was and is with us the entire time. Even when... especially when we felt alone.
Be safe. Infantry leads the way.
Jim Batchelor
2023
