Solid Gold

   September 12th 2017- I was on my way back to Florida from the funeral services of my beloved mother in the Dominican Republic. I was accessing the damages caused by hurricane Irma, the same hurricane that had me stuck on that “paradise island” during those sad times.  We suffered the winds of that hurricane in the Dominican Republic and suffered the same nightmare again but this time from a distance. Thinking about the horrors that my hometown could be going through, not knowing what the final outcome will be and wondering will I have a home when we get back? Praying to God to protect the lives of all our loved ones. It was too much stress for a combat wounded veteran.

It’s been a horrible month with Hurricane Irma, Hurricane Maria, Mexico earthquake, Puerto Rico, Nuclear crisis in North Korea!! But the tip of the iceberg was on Monday September 18, 2017. I received the final blow, a combat wounded veteran, a brother in arms, a personal friend had committed suicide in Pensacola Florida, his name I will reserve. His kids used to play with mine on several veteran related events. They were a beautiful family very similar to mine. This time it was him but next time it could be anyone. It is difficult not to compare his situation with my own case, only God knows at the end. We are all in the same boat.

For as long as I remember I have always felt strongly about supporting our nation’s military in one way or the other.  Because of the deep respect that I have for those who are willing to defend our country and sign that dotted line knowing the sacrifices and the risk that it entails. That’s primarily the reason that made me want to become one of them. Today I am a veteran that was also wounded in Iraq while serving with the United States Army First Infantry Division during Operation Iraqi Freedom in 2004.

It’s been a long journey from that tough time to this day. As many people may believe the traumas of war don’t end when the guns stop firing. It took me two and a half years to finally get medically discharged from the Walter Reed Army Medical Center. There, I was receiving treatment for my combat wounds post traumatic epilepsy consequent to a penetrating traumatic brain injury, loss of all vision in my right eye and a full thickness macular hole in my left eye retina that leaves me legally blind. Among other wounds, the worst of all was the post-traumatic stress disorder that I did not want to recognize or even accept that a soldier like myself could have something like that.

Today, I know that the post-traumatic stress disorder that I am suffering is not a sign of weakness but a sign of strength. PTSD is nothing but surviving something that most people fear to do. It took me a long time to interiorize this. In combat, you must make decisions immediately regardless if you feel that decision is right or wrong and you must live with those consequences for the rest of your life. Sadly, some of our veterans say that they won’t or can’t live with those consequences anymore.

And there you have me, when I was just released from that military hospital now with a family of my own and juggling between worries and responsibilities some of them so simple as just trying to remember when to pay my water bill on time and as complicated as readjusting to my new way of living in the tranquil tempest of my blindness. After 31 years of being perfectly sighted this was not an easy task to do. Today I wish that the people around my life during that tough time could understand the screaming demon that resides inside of the chest of a wounded veteran.

Every day 22 service members in this nation decide that they will take their own life. That’s a suicide every 65 minutes. This is a shocking number and could even be higher. I know that the problems and issues of military suicide are too complex for a single answer because it could be a financial, housing or a relationship issue that is driving those feelings of being overwhelmed and depressed. It could be from any physical issues, like the loss of a limb or a mental issue like the PTSD. The point is that we cannot address this issue with a band aid solution anymore. We need a definitive solution.

That’s why the approach that our organization, The Coalition to Salute America’s Heroes is bringing to this problem is to secure the family first, by providing a part time, flexible time job to a veteran or their caregiver so they can feel productive and understood one more time. Because when the family is secure, a good soldier will never fail.

Many of you may agree with me that the strength of our nation stands on our armed forces in the same way that the strength of our armed forces stands on our soldiers but the strength of our soldiers stands and relies in our families. Yes sir, our families.
When a soldier goes to war, the family also goes to war. In the same way, when a soldier gets wounded, our family also gets wounded.

The Coalition to Salute America’s Heroes brings an effective approach to this problem by allowing our Veterans to be apart of a program with the possibilities to excel the recovery process of any Veteran or wounded family. From my personal experience, when I am immersed in this cyber work space calling our donors to say thank you- I am not thinking about any of the bad memories that haunt and brutalize me daily. Each and every call I make for the Heroes Thanking Heroes Program makes me feel one step closer in my personal road to recovery.

Now that you know about this great program, the Heroes Thanking Heroes from The Coalition to Salute Americas Heroes, would you like to help us provide work for 6 months of flexible time to a recently wounded Veteran or his/her caregiver?
Come join us in our goal to have zero Veteran suicides in one month. The life of our wounded Veterans are in danger, the life of our Veteran’s worth is way much more than solid gold.

The Finest Liquor

The German Naval forces were vigorous during World War II. German submarines, also known as underwater boats or U-boats, had a dedicated mission to prevent allied forces from bringing in supplies to aid with the war efforts. The U-Boats would destroy the merchant vessels and then search the seas for victims using intelligence reports that contained information on the destination, speed and location of the vessels.

\Kapitӓnleutnant Hans-Dieter Heinicke was commander of the U-576 and the brains and eyes of the operations. It is the commander’s responsibility to oversee the decisions, missions, and actions of his crew.  The commander leads alone while the others follow blindly only performing the tasks and duties requested of them. Sometimes “wolf packs” were organized so the submarines could hunt the waters in groups. This wasn’t always feasible depending on the geographical location so it wasn’t uncommon for the U-Boats to hunt alone.

 

When a target was spotted by the U-Boat, the enemy vessels could be tracked for days until reinforcements were brought in by the German Navy. Attacks could originate from the surface or underwater depending on the circumstances. Equipped with guns and torpedoes, the crew would assess what damage they could visually see on the surface, before diving back into the water for protection from a counter attack.  

It was already nighttime, the stars shined bright in the distance. The temperature was very pleasant for that time of the year although most of the time in the Caribbean, you cannot perceive the season changes. This particular U boat has caused severe damage across the Caribbean. Its mission causes the most damage to anything that moves and breathes around the Caribbean Sea as well as the Atlantic Ocean. The Barlovento Islands already paid a big and unfair price. If any American ships pass through their gun sight, they would cause damage. Their mission was clear… Make sure that all of that cargo did not reach its destiny. Make sure that the allies didn’t get enough supplies. They had to be very cautious, like a silent hunter waiting for its prey. During the daytime, they needed to be underwater much of the day. As soon as the sun goes down, the Commander gets ready to get some rest and recharge his batteries. He relaxed on the bridge of the submarine while observing the stars and breathing the fresh air, satisfied by the mission accomplished. The fresh air was necessary because when you are in a submarine environment, especially those German U boats, the faulty air produced by the Congregation of human life in a small space was not easy to breathe. At that moment, a Sailor came up and said, “My commander, the first officer is not doing any better.” He was very ill with a tropical disease that was putting in jeopardy his life and the life of others on the U-Boat.

He gave a direct order, “Give him the best medical treatment that we have available on board.” He hadn’t gotten much rest before the sailor returned shortly with the news that the first officer had died. The commander frowns with a little sadness and gave the final instructions, “Prepare everything The way we do for all our officers and make sure that you follow that to the point.” All of this was happening in the Caribbean Sea close to the Dominican Republic.

The next day, it was about 3:00 pm. Because of the 2nd World War, everything in the Caribbean Islands was a stand still. There was no movement economically, physically, or spiritually. German U-boats took a big toll around the Caribbean waters. There was a prohibition to get out in the water, to go fish in the Dominican Republic. The fishing boats were forbidden unless you had permission from the Dominican Navy Captain and that was almost unheard of. Due to the ban, Fishermen in the Dominican Republic were going through a very precarious situation. If you have nothing to fish, then you have nothing to sell or offer. But you must endure all that because the dictatorship of Rafael Leonidas Trujillo was so harsh.

General elections in the Dominican Republic were held on May 16, 1942. Rafael Trujillo was the only candidate in the presidential election so he was elected and his Dominican Party won every seat in the congressional elections. This was the first election in Dominican history in which women could vote.

This era unfolds in a Caribbean environment that was particularly fertile for a dictator. All regimes in the countries of the Caribbean based alone, his dictatorship was concurrent in whole or in part with those in Cuba, Nicaragua, Guatemala, Honduras, Venezuela, Colombia, and Haiti in retrospect. This dictatorship has been characterized as more exposed, achieved, and brutal than those that rose and fell around it. Nobody there wanted to break the rules.

It was already 3:00 pm and there were two fishermen friends looking from a cliff that overlooks the beautiful sea in Barahona Province, located around 250 kilometers from Santo Domingo, the Dominican Republic Capital. Things were not easy at that time in Barahona. The coastline is beautiful. It seems like when the waves come, they rush to the shore leaving a whitetail. It’s a beautiful sight to enjoy from land. 

Those fishermen were just trying to kill time. Talking about one thing and moving quickly to another, not a coherent conversation let’s say. Hunger and frustration led the way. At a certain point, Nelson looked at Antonio closely and asked him, “Can you tell me what it is that you’re looking at? … So concentrated." Nelson said, “I’m not sure. It looks like there is something shining over there in the sea.” Antonio replied, “Stop paying attention to that, it must be a flying fish”. 

And they continue with the conversation. But not too long from that Antonio said again, “Wait, a second. You are STILL looking that way. Tell me what it is”.  Silence beams and then his response, “Something is wrong! I’m not going to stay here another second so let’s go over there. Let’s go right away to find out what it is." That’s when they realized that in order to do that, they would have to take the fishing boat out. Nelson said, “Remember that if the Navy Captain finds out about this we are both going to end up in jail.“ Antonio responded, “OK, but let’s do it anyways and we’ll do it very quietly “. When they arrived at the spot, they found a 55-gallon tank with a German Swastika and other German writing on it. That symbol was already very well known all around the world. There was always a continuous supply of merchandise coming up from the deep of the seas that would wash over the Caribbean island shores from the problems and sunk ships of the war. They could use all that to resale purposes. Nelson and Antonio quickly tied that tank onto their vessel and rushed to the shore as quietly as possible so nobody would find out what they were up to. They lifted the tank that they presumed was filled up with a combustible substance. They couldn’t be sure of the contents because everything was written in German. They quickly marked the location so they could find it the next day and finally see what the tank would contain, hoping for that precious liquid. 

The next day, they managed to make a hole in the tank.  From that hole, the liquid that was dripping was clear and golden. One of the men caught a little bit of that liquid in his hands and the smell instantly brought him to the realization that the liquid was alcohol. “Ahh Ahhh Ah!  My brother, this is very good!” Nelson said.  “Please let me try it too. Pour everything into this cup “ Antonio said.  He swallowed a little bit and said: “Wow! This is marvelous!” Each one looked at each other suspiciously. Antonio demanded, “This Rum is OURS! So, that means it belongs to both you and me. It’s not just yours only so don’t start giving this away to everybody. And please don’t be a whistleblower. You know that if the Navy captain knows about this, we are going to jail. On top of that, this rum is meant to be enjoyed by us.”  The two friends make a promise not to tell anyone but it was a promise not meant to be respected. One friend has a friend and that friend has another friend and Nelson had a childhood friend that he couldn’t wait to share the information with because after all, he had to try a taste of the finest liquor too.

Another friend noticed that they were all the time drunk. In a harsh manner. he got straight to the point, “Hey, wait for a second! Where are you finding money to drink all that?” Nelson replied, “Well, I have a secret. We found a treasure, a tank apparently from one of those ships that got sunk in the war and we have been drinking from that finest rum little by little. But it’s a secret so please don’t tell anybody.” He said, ”OK, I will keep my mouth shut but I need to have a fair cut of that treasure.“ And with that, he went on to tell his friend that told another friend and that promise between friends had been broken.  The secret was out.

The Dominican Navy captain was noticing that it was increasingly common to find a fisherman wasted in the street. Knowing the current economic status of the nation at the time, he needed to find out how those people were able to finance their drinking. He looked at his surroundings, well aware that something was going on. He managed to capture a poor soul and put him on lockdown in the torture cell. He pulled out a piece of petrified wood they used to call the whistleblower. Because nobody could handle being beaten by that ancient stick, it only took one shot. 

One swing in between the back of the knee and the ankle and the man immediately halted the torture. “Wait a second, wait a second. It belongs to Nelson and Antonio! They FISHED a 55-gallon tank in the sea and they have been drinking from that ever since!"

The Navy Captain responded, “Very well, very well. So they think they were going to fool me, huh?” The Navy captain went straight to meet Nelson to tell him  “ Hey, So that means that I am worthless over here? That I am not the commander in chief Of all this region?“ 

“No, no my commander” they both pleaded, “don’t lock us down.”

“So, everybody over here is drinking, everybody over here knows what is going on and I am the last one that knows about it? And you know, I am the first one that needs to know what is going on.”   The commander was stern.

The men were trying to tell him how everything happened but he interrupted, “It's obvious that you have had this for a long time. Everybody is wasted, everybody is drunk and I am the last one that happens to know about it. You’re going to go to jail. because I didn’t get a single drop.”  

“Wait! Wait! Please forgive us. And here you can have the first of all the gallons you may want. When you finish this one, come and we will fill up another gallon.”

With that promise, the commander got his gallon of the finest liquor tasting it right away. “Oh my God, This is very good.”

Like everything in life, there would come an end to that precious liquid. But at that time everyone knew that the place where all the taste was coming from was still inside that tank. They believed the tank would reveal the secret to making their own supply of the rum. They agreed not to open the container until the last drop of liquid came out. Finally, they managed to go through the 55 gallons. On that day, the whole town concerted a big town ceremony. Everyone that had tasted little the finest liquor was in the presence. They wanted to have a piece of whatever it was that remained in that tank in order to produce their own batch of that exotic moonshine. So it was a big ceremony in front of Nelson And Antonio’s House. When they opened the tank, they found a fully dressed German officer with an impeccable white naval German uniform, even with the hat on. It was a German officer in a fetal position that was placed inside the tank preserved with pure alcohol.  

We need to understand that the German system believed that they would last 1000 years. Each time a high-ranking officer died in the sea or in a U-boat, they prepared the body like that. They would then throw it to the sea so they could pick them up on their way back to Germany for a proper burial on Dutch land.

To preserve that officer in a good state. they placed the officer’s body in pure alcohol and all the people drank their share.

That day, everyone became ill. There were people in denial saying, “Of course, I never drink off that!” Others would say, “I do not drink alcohol.” So, in a complete shame, nobody ever spoke anything more about what happened. The German officer got a proper burial but everybody stayed silent because nobody wanted to admit that they drank from the German rum. 

Today, you can go to Barahona Cemetery and you will find a cross that does not have a name. It reveals an inscription took from the side of that tank that translates, The Superior Race. But nobody ever knew who he was? Or what was his name?

But for sure in Barahona, they drank from the finest liquor.

Contribution by: Hugo Gonzalez

Sources:

Blaney, D. (2016, Sept 4). U-576: Life and Death on a World War II German U-boat. 

Retrieved from http://oceanexplorer.noaa.gov.

Images courtesy of NOAA and Ed Caram Collection

In God we Trust

I am a legally blind wounded Veteran. I remember the last time I had the opportunity to be seen by a civilian Ophthalmologist. After a brief “Good Morning”, which was more of a formality, he got me prepared and properly dilated then quickly went to work to get the full advantage of the medicine in my eyes. He went to get a glance of the back of my eye just to abruptly stop.  He said to me, “My Son, how did you do this to your eyes, what has happened to you?’  I respond to him with “It was a road side bomb in Iraq that exploded too close to my head and a hot sharpened piece of metal penetrated my left eye.”  End of conversation.

To say that the beginning of my day starts when I wake up in the morning is not accurate. I must consider what kind of struggles I went through the night before to fall asleep. The tossing and turning, going up and down on a train of thought that should not necessarily be about the pestilence and wars but perhaps about the different situations that may have happened that day or even years ago.

I am constantly thinking and analyzing how things actually happen, how I would have preferred it to happen, alternative endings such as the most traumatic and catastrophic ending for that particular road trip. By the time I realize I did not get to sleep is just when the first ray of light starts to conquer our marital room. Then comes the first guilty conscience of the day because I realize that my wife may not have slept at all either. Now she needs to wake up and get our children ready for school. Meanwhile, I can either succumb to the tiredness of a long night of sad visualizations or just continue pushing forward.  I am a Soldier and my biggest critic.

Because of my visual impairment, most of the time I reject the glimpses of reality that life offers me when I’m out in the open.  Trying to focus on anything three feet from me is too much to ask of the full, thick macular hole that I have on my left eye retina.  This is my good eye.  I have no light perception in my right eye due to an optical neuropathy.  My optical nerve was crushed so anything more than that distance will just be a surreal reproduction, a cubism interpretation of that world that I love so much so I’d rather just close my eyes. Sometimes I fall to sleep, giving my back one more time to my wife and loved ones- I only hope they don’t feel like I’m running away from them. The truth is that as traumatic and catastrophic as my injury sounds for me, there is nothing worse than the severe symptoms of the post-traumatic stress disorder that my family suffers through me. Because of my blindness, I get to use this reasoning and compensate accordingly. But, how do you compensate accordingly?  How do you fight a silent hunter that is waiting for his best opportunity to attack? That is PTSD.  Having PTSD does not mean you are spoken, it merely means you were put to a test and did not fail. It is hard for me to concentrate on a single task without having to think about the worst thing that has ever happened to me, and the possibility of not having the opportunity to be alive in the present.

It is just not normal to be seated at your dining table listening to your child telling a story about her great day at school all while you are feeling like you are about to bungee jump from a platform.  It’s not right and it’s just not fair for them.  So you seclude yourself, going into your own misery, trying to find a repetitive action or something to do, or just listening to your favorite music to get some relief to the pressure you feel in your chest, the actual physical pain.  Then, how do you get around the guilty conscience of the realization that by this time, your loved ones are asking themselves, “What went wrong?” or “What did I say that made him go away one more time?’



I could not say that God leaves me behind or that he does not care about me. As you can see in the picture, He has been with me since the beginning of this odyssey. I still count on the unconditional love from my wife and my baby girls to get me through. I count on the warm touch from my wife when I just need her to put her hands on my head so that I can feel that I am alive as her touch brings me back to the present, to the now. It takes an exceptional person to love a warrior, especially a warrior who’s war will never cease.

Also, I praise my Lord for the great therapeutic benefit I get to receive from the Coalition to Salute America’s Heroes because of my participation in the Heroes Thanking Heroes program. I am able to call donors just to say “Thank you” for their present or past donations for the Coalition to Salute America’s Heroes. We never ask for another gift.  The opportunity helps me feel productive again but most importantly, during my time on the phone, I am talking to American Patriots and focusing on the task I am doing in front of my computer. I do not give my mind the chance to get a ticket with no return on the train of unwanted thoughts.

For a Veteran like myself, there will be no other way possible to maintain and retain a regular job if it is not because of flexible time conditions that the Coalition to Salute America’s Heroes is promoting through this great program, the Heroes Thanking Heroes program.

My intentions with this manifest are to let everybody know how it is like to live with this silent hunter with the PTSD and the challenges that the wounded military family goes through during their personal road to recovery. Until then, in God we trust.

SPC. Hugo L. Gonzalez