Let Them Be

Let Them Be

By: Hugo Gonzalez

Accepting the reality that we are already at the center of this school year, a reality that seems to be a lie because of the rapidity that use to unravel for our wounded military families, but we know that from one moment to another you can also take a desperate, overwhelming slowness ... if you are a wounded military family or if you know one … you know well what I am referring to. My point is that by this time our children are already established in the routine, they know well what their obligations are, to cope with the injuries of their parents and how to accommodate their school year lifestyle and it's requirements. They know well in which subject they are solid and if it were the case, in which subject they may need reinforcement, to finish their school year satisfactorily. In the case of our house, our daughters compete to maintain the honor roll.

This is precisely where the line of thought that led me to write these lines begins to take shape. The pride I feel for my daughters, not to mention for my entire family, has been transcribed to a feeling of respect which emerges and reconfirms itself at the least expected moment. It has happened to me in recent days, and I explain below.

With the typical contagious motivation that our family vehicle embarks during the afternoons when we pick them up at school, each day one of our three daughters takes a turn. They negotiate a little more time between them to relate and share with us the events of the school day, the achievements of the homework of the previous day, and the new challenges assigned to them by their teachers. They know well that from the school, there are approximately 17 minutes on the road and it is a system that we have applied throughout their school career. It's THEIR time and they enjoy it a lot. It is also a very good opportunity for us to learn how their day was, if something extraordinary happened that deserves our attention and more about them in their school environment. 

One day, in particular, the emotion came out through the pores. Two of our daughters are twins and share the same classroom while the youngest is in fifth grade. Practically shouting with emotion, they informed us that the school would participate in a writing competition, promoted by the state of Florida, in which they had to submit a composition in the form of an essay that did not exceed 400 words. The first place winner will receive a $5000.00 prize.

The topics … 

For the 5th grader: WHAT A VETERAN MEANS TO ME … and … for the twins in 7th grade- WHY DO I HONOR THE FLAG?

Wow... Really?  I want to clarify that these issues were assigned by the state, and the girls did not choose them as such, but obviously, it is a topic that in one way or another is closely related to our lifestyle and our environment. An environment that they certainly did not have the opportunity to choose, but they (like many of us) embrace and respect, as a basis of life, or very deep in the heart.  We spoke again about respect and emotions were strong as we arrived at the house. By 7pm, they began to bring me the first sketches, showing me how they were able to shape the ideas that they tried to organize in their writings. Of course, I motivated them and activated the confidence they felt when undertaking this challenge, because as a whim of fate, these specific topics touched each of them very closely, belonging to a military wounded family, as they are the daughters of a veteran wounded in the Iraq war.

A great effort I had to deploy to be able to contain myself. Perhaps without wanting to influence the writing style of my daughters or the sheer fact they made it clear they wanted to be the ones who built this essay, I was happy they still came to me, looking for approval and guidance with some data that by their young age they had no way of knowing. For example, they asked me how many people had died in war... they also asked me which war was the one that I participated in.

A great surprise for me, as they were arriving, as the writings were surfacing, in the same way, my pride arose. I was impressed by how clear my daughter's had established the concept and respect about what can inspire the figure of a veteran of the United States.  Also extremely impressive, was the high level of patriotism that our children can carry, so deep in their being and at such a young age. They presented me with inspiring paragraphs like this one; “This family shows me how much people care for our veterans who risk their lives for us to be here, they risked their lives for us to be in a safe community, and they risked their lives for better people. Veterans to me mean that they care for anything and everything, even for little things, those little things make them happy inside. When I think of a veteran, I think of my dad, and I think of all the things he did for our country” -Lorelei Gonzalez, 5th grade 

"Also, as deep and as personal as this; I’ve met family’s that had an injured family member who fought in the war. You can ask them if it is easy to forget what happened, but really the fight never stops which is what most people think, after the war they put down their guns and all is fine, but it’s not like that. The war still goes on inside. They suffer with medical conditions and dreams of torturing nights they faced while fighting. It’s not easy with a scary image in your head of an event that’s unforgettable.” Leilany Gonzalez, 7th Grade 

This is what Leila wrote in one paragraph; "My dad is who I mostly honor this flag for…  My father fought in the war of Operation Iraqi Freedom.  My father could have died due to his severe injuries.  Brain injury, bullet wound, and fully blind in his right eye and barely any vision left in his left.  The worst injury is how he never forgets what happened that day he almost lost his life… I was not born before that, yet I still live with the task to take care of my father and be cautious.  I’m proud to say my dad fought for this country." -Leila Gonzalez, 7th grade 

As you can read in these paragraphs, I do not think that my pride is for any exaggerated or excessive reason. It should be a great motivation incentive for any father, especially for a father in the situation in which I find myself, to recriminate about the participation and involvement that I have in the lives of my daughters. I would like to have much more involvement than what I believe I am currently having …. as you know we military are very self-critical.

But this is exactly why I have been motivated to write this story. To motivate other parents in my situation or in a situation like mine, to trust in the programming and in the values that you are inculcating in your children, despite your deep military wounds acquired in the war, our children and our families understand more and understand more than we can imagine. 

In this case, my daughters have given me a lesson in life, one of the many I would like to rectify, that fills me with confidence that in the future they will also be respectable citizens of this great nation, just let them be.