Cinderella Liberty

In a marriage, you learn to compromise for one another and communicate. However, it’s not always that simple or easy...

 

We enjoy being a part of our community. We attend several bike events and benefit runs which usually include us being at local bars, VFWs, Legions, etc. Early on in our relationship, we realized that a lot of times, one of us would want to go home and the other was having the time of their life and didn’t want the party to end. This would go back and forth; one night I would want to stay out longer and another night he would want to stay out longer, usually depending on the company or event. We both enjoy socializing but had a hard time communicating when it was the appropriate time to leave at that moment.

My husband and I often sit and reflect on how we can grow together as a couple. We came to the agreement that we needed to set our boundaries ahead of time. We decided when going out, we would always say our goodbyes around 9 and be home no later than 9:30/10 depending on our location. We also agreed if this was going to be broken it had to be discussed ahead of time for a special occasion, like a wedding, vacation, etc.

I am proud to say we have both kept this boundary in place. It has kept us from fighting, having too much to drink, and from evening bar drama. Let’s face it nothing good for our relationship is happening at a bar after 9:30. I love that we both set this Curfew for our relationship; I like to call it Cinderella liberty 😉 and we both stand by it.

We have been open about our set curfew with our friends as they know why we are leaving by 9:00 and no longer try to convince us to stay out. It has been so beneficial for us, that some of our couple friends are implementing the same curfew! One just told me it’s what she and her husband decided to do as a positive change for the new year. My husband and I love to see that our openness in regards to us as a couple setting these boundaries to better support our relationship, has not only helped us but is helping other couples too!

No matter the relationship everyone is growing and changing. My husband and I are always learning how to resolve issues before they become massive problems. We try and talk about things once the dust has settled and find ways to work together to change the baseline. As he says “always seek self-improvement”. We both want to be our best selves and want to see one another succeed. Sometimes a conversation on how to prevent the issue rather than arguing about the issue is the key to the problem. Love is a powerful thing and when you work together as a couple you can be unstoppable. ❤️

Written By: Savanna B. Veteran Caregiver / HTH Representative